How do you determine what God's will really is? Does it matter to Him where or how you serve as long as you serve? What is the responsibility of the children when it comes to adult parents? How can we ever know for sure what God has in mind for us?
Those questions contiune to swirl in my head as I look from a distance at my parents health concerns, my grandchildren growing and my children settling in to their lives. Frankly I don't know how to completely discern what God is trying to tell me. I'm not sure I WANT to know what he's saying.
Over the past few weeks I've fallen more and more in love with the Psalms. The writers of those wonderful bits of poetry continue to challenge me to have a right relationship with my God. So many times they "hit the nail on the head" with how I'm feeling. Sometimes it's hopeless...sometimes it's higher than the clouds...sometimes it's just plain confused.
For years I have steered away from the Shepherd's Psalm (23) because I believe it has been misused, abused and overused. But the truth of the matter is, I've looked at it all over again and it speaks to how I need God to handle me.
I can't always say honestly, "The Lord is my Shepherd" because I don't always allow Him to "lead me in green pastures". Sometimes I try to fill my own cup, choose my own pastures, pick my own waters. But every once in a while, when I'm feeling particularly vulnerable, I allow "his rod and staff to comfort me". When I do amazing peace comes over me.
I know why...it's because His guiding hand is the only hand that can truly lift me up. It's because He has already scouted the path, chosen the place and prepared the pastures. He's has already walked the valley and defeated the only enemy ever to really exist. Now if I can just allow myself to let His victory keep me in the shadow of His love.
As I make decisions about the future...as I continue to ask the questions and wonder about what is right I can boldly proclaim, "The Lord is my Shepherd, I will NOT be in want!"
Thank You Lord for continuing to lead me even when I don't want to be led.
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I am excited to see what God has in store for you and Mom. I pray not really for my selfish wants about it, but about where God needs you to be, and to fulfill His purpose. I wholeheartedly believe that wherever God takes you, the people surrounded by you both are completely blessed in many aspects and that is amazing. I'm jealous! I long for you two to be closer to all of us southern folks. I cannot wait to see where God will lead your lives next. Love you lots!!
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